What is a meltdown? IN BRIEF
A meltdown is when an autistic person loses control. Often, this happens because they have been overwhelmed with sensory information or emotions without a chance to rest or escape. It is crucial to respect autistic people's boundaries. Loss of control can sometimes resemble a panic attack, anger, or unusual behavior such as repetitive or atypical movements. During a meltdown, the person cannot simply stop, and telling them to calm down or make an effort won’t help. Avoid touching or forcing the person to do something. Instead, remove any group that may have gathered around them and allow the person to calm down. If they understand what is happening and you have a solution that allows them to move to a quieter space, you can suggest they accompany you there.
Why Do Autistic People Experience Meltdowns?
Sensory overload occurs when there is too much information, sensory input, or emotional stimuli for the brain to process effectively. Autistic people are especially vulnerable to this experience. If rest is not immediately possible, their behavior may change, leading to an outburst of emotions and sensations that manifest as a meltdown or a shutdown.
Internal Sensations Before and During a Meltdown
Just before and during a meltdown or shutdown, an autistic person might experience various sensations tied to sensory or emotional overload. Vision may become blurry, they might feel heat, sweat, or notice their cheeks turning red. They may feel stomach sensations such as burning or tingling, or even experience burning sensations on the skin of their chest and back. They might feel their muscles becoming stronger or weaker. Not all of these sensations need to occur during a meltdown or shutdown, but they can serve as warning signs.
The Meltdown
A meltdown is the external expression of the consequences of sensory overload. An autistic person experiencing a meltdown may feel as though they are losing control of their actions. It’s as if the accumulated pressure from trying to “act normal” suddenly needs to be released. This can manifest as crying or yelling. They might display aggressive behaviors toward themselves, objects, or surfaces, such as hitting walls or floors. However, these actions are not driven by violent intent. An autistic person in meltdown might also move rapidly and unpredictably or rock their body forcefully. Sometimes, the meltdown begins with a physical collapse, where the person may drop to the floor.
How to Respond to an Autistic Meltdown
During a meltdown, shouting at the autistic person to stop “their tantrum” is both ineffective and harmful. If they could stop, they already would have. Shouting or speaking with authority can increase the intensity of the crisis, especially if the authoritative person is unfamiliar to them.
Scenario
A lifeguard speaks firmly to an autistic child experiencing a meltdown. Since the child doesn’t know them, this increases the crisis’s severity and may even endanger the child, who might attempt to flee.
As a bystander, you can help the autistic person regain control. If communication is possible, simply letting them know you are there to listen can be supportive. The person in meltdown might provide clues about what triggered the episode, such as noise, repeated social demands, or a change in routine. By listening carefully, you might identify the cause. Even if the problem cannot be solved immediately, acknowledging the overload can be reassuring. However, too many social demands can heighten their panic. It is better to limit yourself to one or two simple questions. If the autistic person doesn’t respond, don’t take it personally; they may be temporarily unable to communicate.
"I had a meltdown on a wooden bridge during a forest run because the bridge scared me. The guide asked me two questions: ‘Are you hurt?’ and ‘Did you fall?’ Though I couldn’t speak, I managed to shake my head no. This allowed the guide to wait safely with me, giving me space. Eventually, I was able to move forward, though I couldn’t talk and was still crying. I wasn’t in danger or abandoned on the bridge."
Important
Even once the immediate situation is resolved, the person remains in a state of meltdown, having exhausted their mental and physical resources. They cannot recover instantly. Addressing the final trigger can help prevent additional stress, often marking the first step toward calming down.
Living Through a Meltdown in Public
Experiencing a meltdown is already exhausting. When it happens in public, it can feel humiliating for the autistic person. It is best to avoid forming a crowd around them. This is not a spectacle. Depending on the meltdown’s intensity, one or two people can assist by providing a quiet, safe space. Some autistic people prefer to go through meltdowns alone, while others may want company. Some may avoid physical contact entirely, while others might request hugs or the presence of an animal. Each person is different.
Important
Sometimes, an autistic person experiencing a meltdown will not be able to communicate using their usual means (e.g. speech, sign language, echolalia or speech synthesizer). This does not mean that the autistic person is unable to understand what others are communicating. So it's important not to talk about the autistic person as if they weren't there. It's hurtful to be ignored.
Dangerous Situations
Most of the time, while meltdowns may appear dramatic, they are not dangerous. Crying, yelling, or physical sensations do not endanger anyone. These behaviors are the most common. However, there are rare instances when meltdowns can pose risks to the autistic person or others, though these are not intentional.
Harmful Stimming
Stimming, or self-stimulatory behavior, helps autistic people self-soothe. During meltdowns, some stims can be risky. For example, the person might bang their head against a wall or hit themselves. It is not recommended to forcibly stop these movements, as this could injure both the autistic person and the bystander. Instead, offer soft surfaces (like a pillow) to minimize harm.
Other Forms of Collisions with Objects and People
During a meltdown, an autistic person may move quickly and forcefully, increasing the risk of injury to themselves or others. To the best of your ability, create a safe space. You can suggest the person move to a room with ample space, ensure others do not attempt physical intervention, and remove potentially harmful objects. Never confine the person to a small room, especially if they are a child. This can be traumatizing and make it harder to build trust in the future. Moreover, it will not shorten the duration of the meltdown or reduce the risk of injury. Toward the end of the meltdown or shortly afterward, autistic individuals often choose to rest in a quiet room alone if they trust their environment and the people around them.
What to Do If You Have Dangerous Meltdowns
Although meltdowns are the result of an accumulation of stress, they are not an excuse for all behaviors. Hitting others or yelling insults can lead to negative consequences for oneself. No one deserves to be hit or insulted. If such violent behaviors occur during meltdowns, it is crucial to seek help. Support services in psychology, psychoeducation, social work, or a support group can help develop strategies for managing these situations. Violence is not an inherent part of meltdowns.
Life After a Meltdown
There is no shame in experiencing meltdowns. They indicate that the autistic person has been compensating for too long in an unsupportive environment. Although meltdowns can negatively impact self-esteem, they also provide valuable learning experiences. They signal that a boundary has been crossed, and recognizing limits is essential for self-care.
After a meltdown, the autistic person will likely feel exhausted. This is the time to ensure they have access to the calm and routine their body needs. They may want to sleep, engage in a comforting activity tied to their special interest, or use a calming stim. Any of these strategies can help their body and mind recover.
